wait . . .

a minute.

Why don't i feel anything negative?

Why don't i want to scream and cry yet laugh as a defense?

Why am i listening to The Weepies and Mika instead of Damien Rice and Maria Mena?

Why do i search my soul through and through but find nothing short of peace and joy?

this is very odd to me. I have torn my half of the room out and into my car. yes, almost all of my belongings can fit into my honda accord. (not including bicycle, speaker, and guitar) they are special and will be taking the 2nd trip to Utah.

I think that moving and change has become so second nature that my faith in God's abilities is almost whole at this point.  it feels great.  i feel confident.  i'm leaving SoCal and heading into the snow but I sit here bobbing my head and eating a popsicle.  I think that I am truly finding my old self again. the girl who you couldn't get to stop laughing in 7th grade, who literally wore a ginormo smile on her face 24/7.

I think i've become more down to earth . . . less emotionally dramatic . . . more calm and collected . . . less rude and sarcastic.  it's the jules that was born on August 10th of 1989 as Julie Lucille Morrow.  I don't know what bug infected me for the past 3 years but I gained an attitude far from gratitude and I think i've pinpointed (yet again) another amazing thing California has done for me. 

It's helped me grow into being me again.

 *i'd say a jumping high-five is in order*

i will relish in peace and joy. it is sufficient. 

 

Quick. . .

I need advice.

I don't know why the photoshoot is stressing me out more than anything else but it is.

Red lipstick? or not? i am just planning on super simple make up, mascara, eyeliner, and perhaps red lipstick?? i'm horrible with these decisions. help. pleeeeeease.

honesty greatly appreciated :)

my schedule . . .

for the next 2 weeks looks like this.

Friday: Beach

Saturday: Beach

Sunday: Church

Monday: Beach

Tuesday: All day recording

Wednesday: All day recording

Thursday: Move half of stuff to Utah

Friday: Unpack

Saturday: Conference

Sunday: Attend Conference

Monday: Drive back to Cali

Tuesday: Beach

Wednesday: Beach

Thursday: All day recording

Friday: Photo shoot with an old-school suitcase and wheat field

Saturday: Beach

Sunday: Church

Monday: All day recording

Tuesday: listen to recordings all day

Wednesday: Master final CD

Thursday: Move back to Utah

Pretty much, i'm feelin' like a spiritually enriched rockstar.

Guys.  My cd is going to be seriously awesome.  We have been mixing it and adding all the details and it's actually for the first time sounding real. Don't let the lack of exciting punctuation fool you, I'm as giddy as a school girl. MY CD IS FINISHED THE 13th of OCTOBER

Album Preview . . .

Vid.

Check it.

I really do apologize for the creepy factor . . . but it's the reel deel

"ODE TO US"

Superstitious beings walk right through me daily, gives me chills but that's okay. While high strung fathers lift their nose up into grey skies just to prove they'll never get there anyway.

Open up our eyes and we'll see. I'm calling every kind of you to gather around me and sing ae ae sing ae ae ode (repeat a few thousand times) ode to us.

You keep going as if world were not around you, we all know it's in your cave you hide.  But see that dull born lady? there's no one else like her, let's put our breath together, exhale, and make her fly.  

Open up your eyes and you'll see. I'm calling every kind of you to gather around me and sing ae ae sing ae ae ode (yada yada yada)

ode to us. 

You're all apart of me and these voices set me free so thank you for allowing me to finally just let me be.

Ode to us.

New project . . .

I'm taking on.

Since my days will be spent in Utah for an indefinite amount of time, I have decided to seize the opportunity of being around many people who are engaged or about to become engaged.  Light-bulb moment. 

What can I provide for your wedding??

A) I can provide all the music. you name the artists and songs, I'll cover them like they've never been covered before.  I believe I have a knack for covering :)

B) I have decided to offer my services of music and lyrics.  I will interview both bride and groom-to-be together and separately, gathering every piece of their souls I can to compose a song just for them and perform it at their wedding, if they so desire.  this is no easy task, I am my harshest critic when it comes to writing songs but I think it is a good opportunity for me to grow in creativity while making someone else's special day, THAT much more special.  plus, the money don't hurt!

Because my CD is wrapping up, you will all be able to hear and know my writing style soon if you purchase a copy of my CD :)

Pass on the word, because this may just become the next big wedding "must-have" 

wooooohooooo

Loves love!!

You know you live . . .

In the  s*n*o*w  when . . .

- fashion is thrown out the window and all puffy, ugly coats are a go!
- you and your roommates keep a "slip and fall on ice" tally.
- sledding is a competitive sport.
- your eyes are glued to the ground for an entire season.
- you truly understand the concept of frozen snot.
- driving becomes a prerogative of the brave.
- everybody and their dogs are diagnosed with seasonal depression.
- you wake up 45 minutes earlier than any other season to be  p.u.n.c.t.u.a.l.
- p u zz l  es and candles are kept nigh for any sudden week-long power outages.
- ice scraping must be mastered to prevent frustration.

- snowboarding vs. snow skiing is no laughing matter!
- your desire for a boyfriend grows 10 fold just to keep yourself a leeeetle bit warmer.

looking forward to the snow is all :)

Love love

So i've been . . .

performing for multiple years now.

I know all about it.
The thrill, the adrenaline, the big ego that follows a perfectly sung song.
I've felt it over and over and over again. I yearned for it, I'm good at it.  It doesn't make me nervous. I gained confidence, I gained friendships.  I enjoy the silence of a room full of social butterflies whose ears are tuned so carefully to catching every word that escapes my lips.
It's an art form that I feel I have captured well.

Because I know performing, I know audience.  I've seen it all!  from people who couldn't give a lick about my poetry, to those who I have come to know and love very well only because of a song I sang that touched their core.  I have tried my best to please the diverse audiences that come my way. 

But then there is that ONE audience.  The one with a solo viewer.  The one that listens more intently than any of the others combined.  The one that showers me with blessings and compliments.  The one that helps put me back in my place of humility.  The one who holds the key to my eternal progression.

Guys, I feel so stupid right now.  Monetarily, staying in California would be logical.  I have the opportunity of making a lot and being in the sun constantly.  It's me-Jules. the ultimate dream-chaser.  leaving to go back home.  why?? I may not know exactly why right now.  But I do know that money has never held any weight in my book of importance.  I also know that God is the only audience I have that is worth pleasing. 

I may not ever have crowds cheering my name and singing my ditties.  I may not ever have gobs of money to pass around to those in need.  I may not ever live in year-round sun again.  BUT- I will have the assurance that I am doing everything in my power to please my Heavenly Father.  I DO have this opportunity to sacrifice a potential booming music career. Not because I can't do it.  Jules doesn't believe in cants. It's because I have one goal ultimately that stands above the rest.

I am Julie Lucille Morrow, a daughter of God, whose potential is beyond words and comprehension.  I have great faith that my Father in Heaven is leading me back to him through small and simple means.  I know that if I continue this way my whole life, I will live with him again and reign in glory in the eternities.  THAT is why I am here. and THAT is why it is okay for me to give this up.  I know that there is more in store.

The best part about it?? the fact that if we all strive for the same goal, we'll reign together as gods and goddesses, in eternal bliss. I love you all!!!

Utah . . .

I can't even begin to tell you how nervous this post is making me. but here goes nothing.

Utah, we meet again.

You are harsh, unforgiving, and often critical.

You bring back fear, insecurity, and doubt.

You are icy, blazing, and dry as can be.

BUT

if I continue to feel so badly about you, my life will be miserable for the next who knows how long??

It's time for Jules to buck up and pick herself off the pitiful ground she so eagerly lays on.

REWIND   D*N*I*W*E*R

Utah, we meet again.

You are picturesque, mountainous, and full of adventure.

You are artsy, outdoorsy, and playsy???.

You hold family, friends, and many future friends.

You are seasonal, fresh, and abundant

You are my home. old. and again, new.

Jules is moving back to Utah, because Jules has been blessed with the gift of receiving revelation and the courage to act on it.

I am ready, armed, and actually excited to learn the art of snowboarding.

Signing up for psych classes at the "U" and conjuring SLC venues to perform and sell my CDs (when recording is finished in a month)

Sometimes, we think we know exactly what God has in store for us. . . but that usually ends in a big puddle of "whoops, I have no idea which (sometimes million) pathways would be most helpful in my life long journey of returning to my Heavenly Parents."

I've spent the past 9 months in warm sunshine, surrounded by people who have done nothing but lift and build up my emotional and spiritual stability.  I guess I'm ready to go back, head first, into the fire. right where I need to be.  

I'm soooo nervous. I'm getting sooooo excited. It's sooooooo surreal, seeing as I was convinced a couple of months ago that I would never call Utah my home again.

NEVER SAY NEVER. lesson learned.

Wish me luck. lots of it. 

UTAH,

here I come . . .

HOW?? . . .

HOw in the world have I never seen this video??? life just became 10 times happier.

Just like painting . . .

a picture or collaging can be therapeutic to me, so can creating graphic art.

I got the bicycle necklace a couple of days ago and gushed over it. a tiny little bike held by a chain worn around the neck of a person who isn't exactly scaled proportionately to ride the bike.

I couldn't stop holding it! realizing that if there was a mini man who hopped on board, I would have the ability to guide him wherever he goes more successfully than the imaginary personage.  My perspective was greater, therefore giving the little guy an opportunity to be led (mostly into the unknown) because I could see much more than he could.

God is my guiding hand in everything.  I continue to be more and more grateful for this every single day.

oh how I love him, my Heavenly Father

Eternal . . .

perspectives are present every time I am a blubbering mess due to Mormon Messages: