Sometimes . . .

I get so busy making sure everyone sees how beautiful they truly are, that I forget others are yelling it to me.

Disclaimer: this song does not swear, contrary to the title. Also, i have a feeling that most people will find the cutting in this video taboo, when in reality . . . it's as damaging as eating disorders or stealing. I read through comments of people who expressed their gratitude for helping them know there is hope.  Atta girl, P!nk

I am coming to learn more and more by the grace of God, that our actions don't add or subtract to our "worth" as His perfect creations.
love yourself.
and if you feel so inclined, fall to your knees in gratitude to the perfect Creator for your body, mind, and spirit, for the Light of Christ that helps us to breathe.

p.s. when p!nk is pleading or pounding her chest, don't you feel like you can relate?? like you've tried so hard to either realize that yourself or help others see the light. i love how real it is. she wants people to believe it. so beautiful.


i'll take this opportunity . . .

to cry.

so i went to an incredible group therapy session last night.  I began to complain about my pounding headache and the medicine man gave me a pillow to scream into ("a miracle" he said, "what screaming can do for a headache").  All eyes were on the three of us women inflicted with throbbing heads and after an uncomfortable laugh, I decided to oblige and join the other two.  Like the flip of a switch, after what seemed like an eternity of blood curdling scream, my emotions transferred and i shook like a baby in sobs. 

I felt so sad. so much sorrow. i was shocked by my grief.

I heard a communal pout for my sadness as if a puppy had died (maybe because i was the baby of the group), collected my emotions and even cough/choked on my water immediately after.

"that was textbook how your fierce scream turned into a sad bawl.  I know you think the cough had to do with the water, but there's more to it than that." the medicine man left me with so much to think about, so much mystery.

and this morning, i awoke . . . as if the world were new. 

thank you medicine man and thank YOU Christ, for the Atonement.  That all encompassing, all powerful miracle.

scream, i dare you.


i still say hands down. . .

this is one of the best if not BEST dance videos on youtube. don't even argue

I've searched elisa dances for hours. this takes the cake

When we

". . . lack confidence in our own abilities as God’s children, or God’s abilities as our Master, full potentials are left in the stars, completely unreachable."  

             -Jules Morrow

weird that i'm quoting myself, right? but i came across that obvious piece of revelation in my journal and had the urge to share.


i - i - i - i - i - i came to . . .


I'm one of those wedding party attenders who believes that the reception was not invented for congratulations, or fancy, delicious food.  it was made for dancing.  and boy do i love me some good dance parties.
 *i make a jolly good dancer, no?*

mission: find new "mountain" like spot now in full swing, heaven help me before i bust out in the midst of the park crowd while jogging to Taio Cruz.